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Wednesday, April 24, 2024

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    How Do I Stop Having Morning Elections?

    So looking back, I try to think about what my new year’s resolution for this year was. Frankly, I don’t remember. See why I don’t bother? It is hard work remembering you promised yourself something and harder to keep to it. Heck, the only new year’s resolution I every kept was when I was 13 and made one to stop bitting off, chewing and swallowing my fingernails. 

    How did that turn out? Well I have nails that are not strong hence they do not grow that long as every now and then, they break off but what they lack in strength, they have in sharpness. My nails can cut and sratch through a human skin without me even trying. I have had to appologise to many times and seen skin peel off people from my nails. This must be an evolutionary step right? 

    This is why having ADHD is not good sometimes, I opened this to write about we Yoruba demons and try to give small insights but here I am rambling about new year resolutions and finger nails.

    Just Imagine having ADHD and trying to ask a girl out. There is no amount of like or love you have that will keep your interest long; not when your brain is trying to do 15 things at the same time, heck I doubt my tab can do 15 things at once.

    About this ADHD, there was a time I actually tried to string two independent thoughts at the same time. Of course I was in that (personal) magical age of 16 when I discovered I am a nut case and loved it. Yes I did it. I still have multiple thoughts though, more than one active thougts at the same time maybe that’s why I live more in my head than the world around me. 

    About this heamophobia. I should/could have been in the medical field, maybe A doctor or perhaps a vet but seriously, I have some serious heamophobia. Look, I have conquered almost all my fear except gamophobia and heamophobia. Gamophobia cos I enjoy it and heamophobia because when it comes to those thick red iron smelling salty liquids that gives life, I am a pathetic weakling and I shrivvle up in an almost death giving fear. I might mask it so no one knows but within me, I am counting numbers and trying to solve calculus questions in my head just to distract myself. 

    I hate the sight of blood; be it mine, yours or an animals. 

    Wait, I don’t also carry babbies less than 9 months old. Why? What if I drop and/or break the baby? Sure, a baby is not that fragile(seriously?) but sorry, I can’t carry one. Ask the child to come back when grown. 

    Okay, that song is outta my head now, let me go look for my Vector album and do some rap music. 

    And without trying to sound corny (even though it sounds corny) please who knows how to stop having morning erections?

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